UNDERSTANDING THE ROLE YOU PLAY IN MARRIAGE


1 Peter 4 8

The true key to every successful marriage is putting God first. Marriage was designed as a life long process; the more spouses try to learn how to understand one another the better their marriage will be.

If you’re a Christian husband and you don’t love your wife in the way Christ love the church your probably not going to get the respect you’re looking for. You’re also going to run into problems like 1 Peter 3:7 Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers.

It’s also true that as a Christian wife if you’re a wife like describe here. Proverbs 21:9 Better to live on a corner of the roof than share a house with a quarrelsome wife.

Proverbs 21:19 Better to live in a desert than with a quarrelsome and nagging wife.

Proverbs 12:4 A wife of noble character is her husband’s crown, (but a disgraceful wife is like decay in his bones.) It would truly be a difficult task for a Christian husband to be that Ephesians 25 husband you’re looking for under the circumstances above. Ephesians 25 verse is probably the most famous verse in the bible about being a husband and almost every woman know this and is probably quick to remind their husbands. But how about the verse right before that, Ephesians 5: 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in (everything) and Ephesians 5:33 However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, (and the wife must respect her husband).

God has provided tools for us to use in order to help us fulfill our respective roles in our marriages. One of the tools he’s given us are books. I recently had the honor of reading my friend and great woman of faith Rhonda Stoppe’s book If My Husband Would Change, I’d Be Happy. In this book she reference several of the verses I listed above while speaking to wives about many different topics while taking a seat to explain what Ephesians 5:24 truly mean.

IF MY HUSBAND WOULD CHANGE I'D BE HAPPY

Now Rhonda wrote this book to uplift and inspire women to enrich their relationships with their husbands by getting rid of myths they believe that are keeping them from a happy marriage. She truly wrote this for wives but the way she lays it out truly reaches and penetrates the heart of anyone including men who read it allowing a husband and wife to actually be able to read it together. I was drawn in so much by the way it was written that I honestly had a hard time putting it down (and I’m a man so can only imagine women that read it) because she also talks about stepping out in faith by trusting God in away that forces your faith to grow.

I also couldn’t help but notice how God provided her with the wisdom to not only recognize the important role she plays in her husband’s life but actually live it out. I believe from a husband perspective that was very important because I believe wives truly don’t understand how much influence and power they have when it comes to speaking into their husbands lives. When my wife shows trust and confidence in me I feel like I could take on the world.

Rhonda talks about that in this book and as a wife her book will cause you to truly think about things you’ve done and ways you’ve responded in your marriage in the past that you probably wish you could take back and at the same time inspire you as a wife to approach future situations (because there will be) differently. She explains to you how dangerous unrealistic expectations can be when you bring them into a marriage and she also teaches you how to overcome those unfruitful expectations as a wife.

Rhonda provides truth that as a wife you may recognize. Here’s some examples of those truths. Before Marriage, “I love his spontaneity, After Marriage, “He’s irresponsible.” Before “We can sit for hours just holding hands, After “He doesn’t talk to me”. Before “He’s a hard worker.” After “He works too much.” Before “He is frugal.” After “He’s a tightwad.” As a wife have you ever said any of these things before? She breaks down and equip you with Godly divine knowledge led by scriptures while using her own personal stories to inspire you to have the marriage you truly desire. A marriage that has no regrets. She also gives you an opportunity to hear from her husband perspective.
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Think Through what you’ve read and learned.
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and most importantly an opportunity to challenge yourself by living it out.
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If you’re truly looking for a women’s bible study that will encourage you to grow into that proverbs 31 woman you truly desire to be If My Husband Would Change I’d Be Happy is set up for that allowing you have other wives join you and if you’re looking for a woman who’s called by God to inspire other women in their marriage and in their lives Rhonda’s that woman. You can stay connected with her by following her on twitter @rhondastoppe on instagram at RhondaStoppe and on her website NoRegretsWoman.com. Below is a quote I love from Rhonda.

Making a list of what you do not want your marriage to become is not an effective way to move toward having the marriage of your dreams.
Rhonda Stoppe

I’ll end by saying this that applies to husbands and wives. True oneness in a marriage causes you to become a reflection of one another.
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That’s what we envisioned for our marriage when we walked down the aisle never envisioning being without each other. So lets dance a little, laugh a little and hope a little more.

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